I don't know if this mentality comes with age, but the older I get, the more I crave for quietness and a helluva time alone. I'm not saying I have completely ditched the idea of hanging out with my favorite people, but I guess that's pretty much the extent of my social skills - I just hangout with my favorite people. I think I've reached that age wherein if I really feel one wrong vibe, I'm out of the tribe. 

At some point in your life, you will realize that solitude does not equate to loneliness. I honestly see it as FREEDOM.

I know that most people wouldn't believe me when I say that I feel that unexplainable shot of bliss when I spend a day or even just an hour by myself. I don't even have to do anything cool - I just have to be present, be aware of my breathing and focus on my five basic senses. That's it! That might sound boring to most people, but if you're living in a city and you have to live that hypothetical hundred mile an hour life on a regular basis, then having those hours of not thinking about anything at all is a personal nirvana.

There's absolutely no 'FOMO' going on inside my head when I see people's social media posts when they're traveling to different places and doing all sorts of things especially when I know I am peacefully curled up in my bed with a good book or sitting on the grass at my favorite park while playing with stray cats. I feel genuinely happy for outgoing people and a few of them could even inspire me to move my butt once in a while, but I don't always want to do what everyone else is doing. If I know that doing a certain thing is just going to sap all my energy, I'm not down for it. I like traveling but I only go to places where I could restore my energy; I only crave for places that would help me get closer to nature. You would rarely find me making my way to hot spots unless I have to meet someone important to me.

To make it easier to convince you to practice this habit of spending time alone, I came up with three benefits of carving out some time alone. 

#1 It sparks creativity!

Some of my best artwork and articles are done in silence and solitude. I find it impossible to work on the things I am passionate about with the presence of another human being. Okay, maybe that's too much. It doesn't mean that you have to shut yourself in a real cave but maybe you can find a place where there would be less noise and interaction. I find it hard to concentrate or relax if there are people who constantly interrupt the flow of my creative juices. Probably the only time in my life when I actually dig being surrounded by people was during my high school years. The moment I reached my 20s, I was totally over that feeling of being in a group and boy it's awesome! I really don't see the point of talking when you have nothing important to say; it made me realize that you don't always have to fill the silence. Without knowing it, I've learned to use those solo moments to be productive and enhance my skills. I realized that the more I spend time alone, the faster it takes for me to get things done! Try going to coffee shops, co-working spaces, parks/public gardens if you don't want to spend your 'me time' in your house or room. Don't invite anyone else and resist the urge to send a message to anyone. Just try to be by yourself at least for an hour and see how peaceful and quiet life can be without being controlled by social media notifications. Go people-watching and feel how the world turns while you take a step back. You would get a totally different perspective in life or in the way you do things at work and you would thank yourself for taking that much-needed break.

#2 It gets rid of the mental clutter!

There's a reason why monks meditate in secluded places. Now, you don't have to shave your head and run to Tibet to be able to achieve their level of peace, but you can go on retreats or solo trips if you can afford them. Zen gardens, temples or churches could also work! Basically anywhere you can't be distracted is fine. Having some time to shut your brain from your never-ending to-do list even just for a short period of time is beneficial in enhancing your productivity and problem-solving skills. Notice how your computer performs better after defragmentation? That's pretty much what we're trying to achieve here. Spending time alone would help you sort out the things that you should and should not do. You can get a better idea of what's really important and must be kept and what should be trashed. Hello, inner peace!

#3 It improves your relationship with other people! 

You may be thinking this is way too ironic, I hear you! How can you have better relationship when you are literally trying to isolate yourself from the world? Here's how: When you spend time away from people, you'll get to filter the ones whom you actually miss. You'll know which ones are worth keeping in your life and which ones to let go. Once you find your kind of people, you will have zero tolerance for those who are just not feeling your vibes - also known as the energy vampires. Be smart enough to keep a good distance from those who don't bring anything good in your life. You have to give yourself permission to choose who you want to talk to and hangout with. Yes, I know it's important to have lots of connections nowadays especially if it's for business, but the inner circle must be really small. Always choose quality over quantity. Once you have established your inner circle, then you can invest on some quality time with them. Ditch the "The more, the merrier" mentality, you only need genuine relationship with a few good ones!

Wheew! There you have it! Have you ever tried spending an entire day all by yourself? How about a week or a month? If you haven't, would you be willing to give it a try and see what happens next? Leave a comment down below about how you spend or how you would like to spend your 'ME time'. I'd love to hear from you!


I know not everyone might like this idea, I am fully aware that there are people who get their energy and happiness by being surrounded by people. Perfect example is my sister. When she told me she cries when she's eating alone, I had a good belly laugh! I am SO not like that. Eating alone is one of my favorite 'ME time'. That is the only time I can actually be alone with my thoughts which is necessary if you're always thinking about your next blog or vlog post. My sister and I are from the same tree, yet we are totally different fruits! And I respect her way of living.


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